CARNIVAL PARTY

 

Breaking News

Although I stated that the next CARNIVAL PARTY segment would not come until after the November election, there is breaking news that must be reported now.

The first piece of breaking news pertains to an announcement from Senator Jim DeMint, South Carolina, one of the staunchest backers of the Carnival Party.  That announcement is that all current or planned booths, exhibits, etc., on the grounds employing carnies who are openly gay or lesbian, or employing sexually active single females would now be barred from the grounds.  The announcement did not reference the SENATOR ENSIGN KISSING BOOTH, the SENATOR VITTER MADAMHORN RIDE, or the MARK SANDFORD APPALACHIAN RIDE, which are still open. 

The implications of DeMint’s pronouncement has been reviewed by the Carnival Party carnies and participants, and it has been concluded that participation on the grounds should be limited to straight white men, single or married, who can only have sexual relations with straight white married women regardless of whether the married women are married to them.

The second piece of breaking news is that Meg Whitman is being removed from her position as an employment counselor at the FOX NEWS EMPLOYMENT CENTER.

Her employment of an undocumented housekeeper for nine years in conjunction with her denial that she was unaware of the woman’s illegal status during those years, and her political stance that she wants to prosecute employers of undocumented workers did not pass mustard or sit well with the Carnival Party hierarchy. It is rumored that candidate JOE MILLER of Alaska, who has opined that the federal minimum wage and unemployment insurance are unconstitutional will replace Whitman.

With these developments, news is circulating that the booths, exhibits, tents etc., on the grounds are growing smaller as Carnival Party support is growing narrower and smaller.

Will get back to you after November 2 unless other Breaking News stories arise.